Time for a Reset

Wow, it’s been a minute since I’ve surfaced in some way, other than sharing some great new book releases. There’s a lot going on around here, including some things literary (which I’ll be sharing details about soon).

I made a decision earlier this month that I need to take a bit of a reset. Real life has definitely thrown some interesting things our way over the past couple years, and I haven’t taken the time to figure out a good balance. I’ve focused on freelancing, which has been great, but at the expense of my own writing.

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I made the decision to scale back my freelancing – a lot – so I can focus on next steps with some of my in-limbo projects:

  • Do one final read-through and edit of my post-Civil War romance and send out queries for it.
  • Finish first draft of the first book in my Sweet Somethings spinoff trilogy.
  • Expand a short story I wrote for an upcoming romance anthology (more on that soon, once I have the details) and prep for self-publishing.
  • Return – at long last – to the Magnum Opus and really dig into developmental edits to update, improve, and maybe, just maybe, move toward self-publishing in the future.

As often happens with my ambitious to-dos, there’s a good chance more than one of those goals will not make it to completion. But that’s the game plan right now.

Let Me Talk to Y’all About Hand Foot & Mouth Disease (Part 2)

A few weeks ago, I talked about how Sugarpie came down with a nasty bout of hand foot and mouth disease right at the end of the summer.

It was not a fun time. After that first horrible night of no sleep, we were rather on the downswing. At least in terms of how Sugarpie would fair.

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The Triage Nurse Provides Reassurance and Guidance

The night before the triage nurse at the pediatrician’s office called to give a diagnosis based on the picture’s I’d sent in, I did a bit of my own research into what to expect. The nurse confirmed that the only thing we could really do at this point was try to keep Sugarpie comfortable.

This would involve dosing with ibuprofen and using moisturizer to help prevent itchiness as the blisters began to heal.

She also shared that once the blisters/rash appeared, that usually meant the child is far less contagious, if not past the point of passing on the virus at all, than in the days leading up to the fever and eruption of the rash.

I also asked about the risk to Babycakes. The nurse said that, with older kids, HFMD is usually a mild issue that may or may not present with any symptoms. She advised us to expect a possible fever and maybe one or two blisters, if anything.

Here Comes the Internet to the Rescue

With Sugarpie recovering from her sleepless night and on the mend, I was in search of the best ways to help her blisters heal with the least amount of itching. The last thing I wanted was for her to scratch and cause an infection or scarring. Fortunately since it was super warm, I didn’t have to worry about socks or shoes, and we were able to dress her comfortably in softer cotton clothes. She didn’t get to go on foot for walks, though she was pretty content to be pushed about in the stroller when we went out for air.

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I’d already learned the great things about colloidal oatmeal as it pertains to soothing eczema (which has always shown up during the cold winter months in little patches on Babycakes since she was tiny). I already had a little tub of Aveeno nighttime eczema balm, and we’d used some of their colloidal oatmeal bath packets in the past when Babycakes had mollescum contagiosum. A trip to Target replenished our stock of both, along with a bottle of Aveeno colloidal oatmeal body wash.

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I also turned to one of my Facebook mom-groups to see if anyone had any other suggestions. Multiple people suggested colloidal silver, which I’d never heard of. It comes in gel, sprays, and drops. People also apparently take the latter version as a dietary supplement as it can help boost the immune system.

I opted for the gel version, since reports said it stayed put better. It dries pretty fast, which was excellent for Sugarpie’s diaper area after her HFMD rash went crazy there. (BTW, that’s a commonly affected area in babies and toddlers.)

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I’m not sure if the lotion, body wash, bath packets, and colloidal silver did anything or if it was just the passage of time. But within a few days, Sugarpie’s rash lessened and the blisters began to heal.

The other thing I learned about is that, in babies and toddlers, a symptom of HFMD that is often unrealized or overlooked is that it can cause stomachaches and muscle pain. Headaches are common, as is a sore throat (usually due to sores in the mouth and throat) and loss of appetite. Luckily, Sugarpie didn’t have any issues eating or nursing. But I’d never heard of HFMD causing muscle pain, but that certainly would have explained why she had such a terrible night that Tuesday.

I, of course, felt even worse for how grumpy (to put it mildly) I’d been to her that night.

It Spreads

Sugarpie was soon on the mend, but HFMD wasn’t done with us yet.

About two days later, Babycakes crawled into bed with us and said she had a terrible headache. This is a kid who does NOT complain about headaches and downplays feeling crappy when she has a cold. So I knew something was up. Her temp was indeed high – over 101ºF. I dosed her with ibuprofen, and we spent the day pumping her with fluids and letting her rest. I made her take a nap that afternoon while Sugarpie was sleeping.

Well, I made her relax in her room with a book while I got her sister down for her nap. Then I made her lay down in the dark and cool for an hour. She fell asleep and I let her nap for almost two hours.

She was fine the next day, but I think that was her bout with it.

But then it was Mommy’s turn.

I felt absolutely awful the Saturday after Sugarpie’s Night from Hell. Headache, chills, general malaise. I knew what was coming. I even stayed home from church the next day (not that we were bringing Sugarpie, so we’d originally planned to go in shifts, anyway).

By Monday morning, I, too, had blisters popping out on my hands and feet. My feet, in fact, were on FIRE. I used the colloidal silver and also did a foot soak with epsom salts, which is another soothing option for older kids and adults (not recommended for babies and toddlers).

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But within a few more days, we were all on the mend and just had to deal with the aftermath.

Let Me Talk to Y’all About Hand Foot & Mouth Disease (Part 1)

As a parent, one of the toughest things to deal with is illness in your child. It’s doubly hard when said child is too young to actually tell you what hurts or how they feel bad.

A few weeks ago, just as summer vacation was winding down at our house, we experienced the joy (or lack thereof) that is hand food and mouth disease (HFMD). We’re still not sure exactly where Sugarpie picked it up, though we have some suspicions.

(Here she is, on the beach at sunrise, because why would you let your parents sleep in while you’re all on vacation? At this point, she was feeling pretty awesome.)

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It was a rough couple of weeks for all of us. It turns out that HFMD is not only very contagious but also quite prevalent in the summer and fall. I’m honestly not sure how we avoided it up until now. But we did, even during those three-ish months when Babycakes went to daycare when I first went back to work.

There’s a lot to this story, so in the interest of being slightly less verbiose than I can be about these things, this is going to be a multi-parter. But hopefully by the end of the second installment, I’ll have given other parents some insight into how our experience went down, how we helped our little one get through it, and what the lingering – and somewhat surprising – aftereffects can look like.

The Night It All Started

The Monday after we got home from the beach, Sugarpie had a bit of a restless stretch in the middle of the night. Her temperature was a bit elevated, but I knew this only by touch and my instincts. Still, I got her back to sleep, and we went on with our lives. She seemed no worse for wear the next day.

Now, Sugarpie is not the greatest sleeper in the world, and never has been. (Hello, newborn colic.) But we knew something was going on when she just would not sleep at all the next night.

By Tuesday, we were almost back to the normal routine. You know, waking up at 6:30 instead of before-the-crack-of-dawn o’clock and getting to bed around 8pm. I’d gotten Sugarpie to sleep in our normal way (nursing, don’t judge me), but as soon as I moved to lay her in the crib, she woke up and went totally ballistic.

Like, screaming, arching her back, not letting ANYBODY hold her. She nursed on and off but would just not go to sleep. The hubs tried. My mother tried. My sister (who was visiting) would probably have tried if we begged.

She was awake for THREE HOURS.

Maybe more, I don’t know. But she did finally go to sleep and I was finally able to lay her down in the crib and go to bed myself.

But then she woke up screaming again after less than two hours. And was awake, once more, for like three hours. Maybe more. I’m not sure. All I know is that by 5am, I had not slept at all.

Side note: I am not the most sympathetic person in the middle of the night as it is. I like my sleep and I haven’t had enough solid nights of it in over two years. I am ashamed to admit that I am, thus, not a great parent in the middle of the night. I get irritated, impatient, and overwhelmed in ways that just do not manifest when the sun is up. It does not help that Sugarpie refuses to let her Most Awesomest Daddy even pick her up between sunset and sunrise, so in spite of his best efforts and desire to help, middle of the night parenting falls mostly on me.

Desperate, I brought Sugarpie into bed with us and let her nurse for an hour straight. She fell asleep, I may have dozed a bit. But as soon as I unlatched her to try and bring her back to her room, she woke up and it was all over.

She had totalled about three hours and forty-five minutes of sleep all night long. I had logged exactly zero hours of sleep.

I took her for a “rage walk” at 6:30 in the morning, angry and exhausted and praying she would fall asleep in the stroller for maybe just a half hour. I do not get up for exercise of any sort, so that just shows how desperate I had become.

Desperate Mama Wants Answers

Again, Sugarpie has never slept through the night, ever. We’ve had a nine hour stretch a couple times, but she always wakes up at least once a night. But that Tuesday night was HORRIBLE.

The Worst. Night. Of. Her. Entire. Life.

And that includes the stretch of six-ish weeks when she had colic as a newborn.

I knew something had to be wrong, because why would she not sleep? I mean, she wouldn’t even fall asleep NURSING, which is like . . . guaranteed. So I made an appointment with the pediatrician, but the earliest appointment I could get was the next day. I swore up and down that I needed to take her to urgent care, but outside of the total lack of sleep, nothing would really indicate any reason to bring her to the doctor at all. So I cancelled the appointment.

I was not the best at parenting that day. I think my mother may have sent me back to bed for a little while, as my sister was still visiting and was happy to entertain Babycakes while my mom took care of Sugarpie.

Diagnosis

Then the blisters started.

At first it was just a couple here and there on her hands, arms, and legs.

Not even her feet, really. She had a couple of bug bites from our trip to the beach that hadn’t really healed yet, so initially I thought the little bumps were just more bug bites. And then I noticed more little raised red bumps on her chin and cheeks.

But as I got a better look at them, I started to realize they looked more like the rash that shows up during a HFMD infection. I’d researched it a few years ago when there was an outbreak at Babycakes’s preschool, so I knew what to look for.

Wednesday afternoon, I sent some pics to the pediatrician. The triage nurse called me back the next morning.

Yes, it’s HFMD.

Clawing Back to the Surface & Breathing Again

I’ve realized a few things over the past several months.

First, it is okay for me to go by my baby’s cues when it comes to sleeping. And nursing. Both separately and simultaneously. All the angst I caused myself over sleep training with Babycakes just isn’t going to be a thing with Sugarpie. She will eventually sleep all night. She will eventually learn to fall asleep on her own at bedtime. She will eventually wean (though I will have to do a lot more prodding than I did with Babycakes).

Second and related, I need to do better about my middle of the night reactions to her being unsettled for hours on end. Not necessarily awake. Just not settled.

Third, I need to take better care of my health. I am actually quite healthy, based on the results of my last physical. But I need to work on nutrition and staying in better shape. I promised myself that once Sugarpie was on a predictable schedule, I would weave in workouts and be more mindful of caloric intake. Then 2020 and the stress-eating and the Quarantine Fifteen hit. I recently started up with PiYo again, and am looking at ways to improve my diet throughout the week. Baby steps.

Fourth, I need to carve out time to write. My own stuff. Not other people’s stuff. Being able to freelance has been wonderful in many ways. But I realized in January that I hadn’t written a lick of fiction in over a year. But let’s be real. The past year has been hard in many ways, and I needed to focus more on my family, particularly my children, than anything else.

But it seems like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

Babycakes has been fortunate to be back to school, face to face, since August. 100%, with no problems. Sugarpie takes a pretty solid nap and finally has a predictable bedtime, for all that she still wakes up once or twice a night. We are being cautious in our outings, but we are slowly seeing a return to a semblance of normalcy.

And I have so many ideas for stories.

I know that my family has been lucky. We’ve had our own little challenges, but the catalog of difficulties and hardships the past year has brought to our country would take ages to enumerate. We don’t know exactly what will come next and we certainly can’t control any of it, but we can choose how we comport ourselves. How we respond to others.

We can choose to listen. To be kind. To show compassion. To be tough if necessary, but to be so with love.

Maintain connections. Strive toward goals. Plant flowers.

Live as if you are always moving toward the light at the end of the tunnel, even on days when you seem stuck.

My Earliest Memory (Wednesday Weedkly Blogging Challenge

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Today’s topic for the Wednesday Weekly Blogging Challenge from Long and Short Reviews is

My Earliest Memory

A lot of people don’t necessarily know what their earliest memory is, possibly because we often think we remember things from our childhoods that either didn’t exactly happen, or we’ve been told about something that happened often enough that it becomes a memory.

My earliest memory is quite vivid. It involves a book.

The throwing of a book, to be exact.

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It was the Little Golden Book of Disney’s Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Not a large book, but when one hurls it across the room like a Frisbee, it’s a formidable weapon.

And that’s exactly what I did.

I Frisbee-ed Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs across the living room at my older sister.

It hit her square in the face.

And knocked out her two front teeth.

To be fair, they were already loose. But I remember that one fell completely out and was on the floor in front of her, and the other was kinda dangling there.

I don’t know what she did to make me throw the book. And I’m sure I didn’t get in trouble because I was only, like, three at the time.

But there you go.

What’s your earliest memory?